I’m so sad, so sad, so incredibly sad, I can barely breathe.
Sometimes I can hardly leave my room, let alone go out and do something, I’ve missed so many classes already and I don’t know what to do. I see my friends only if they ‘force’ me to, I never manage to answer my cellphone, I live in this bubble that consists of my laptop, a few books, and music.
I’ve started visiting a therapist in spring, due to panic attacks, insomnia and general uneasiness, but only during last session was I able to acknowledge my main problem, which is social anxiety disorder. But I think it’s more than that, I have no energy, no motivation to do anything, no desire to go anywhere, see anyone, interact with other people, I want nothing, require nothing, all I want to do is to sleep, to escape from reality.
I need to change something as soon as possible, but I don’t know how.
I wish my family and friends understood, but for them my actions come off as either lazy, rude or ignorant. Maybe they are right, I’m not even sure anymore.